>Shoes Make the Man


>Bizarro is brought to you today by Shoes for the New Depression.

Few people realize it, but I’m a big fan of American football. My dad and I bonded over football when I was a kid and I’ve enjoyed it ever since. I played it all through elementary school and junior high, but after that you had to be a side-of-beef-with-cleats to make the team, regardless of your skills, and the social scene (macho jocks) did not suit my delicate, artistic temperament. I don’t go to games and paint myself like an inexpensive souvenir, but I do watch a lot of football on TV.

While I like football and follow it each year, I still find the macho attitude part detestable. I can stand few things less than an athlete or coach interview. They are all the same, virtually interchangeable, utterly predictable. You might as well be asking chickens why they crossed the road.

I often wonder if mainstream pro sports will ever become gay friendly. Statistics would support that there are any number of gay men playing pro sports, but none have ever come out. I wish someone at the very top of the game, like a Super Bowl winning quarterback or linebacker, would come out of the closet. (There is still hope for Steve Young of the 49ers.) It would cause an uproar at first, but in the long run I think it would do a lot of good for gay rights.

One thing I like about sports is that there is such a large psychological component in it. Size, speed, strength, ability, none of these things are enough to win. Without the proper psychology, you’re just another muscle-bound thug with a number on your shirt. Even more interesting, is that an entire team can have a group psychology. The Tampa Bay Buccaneers are a good example. They could scarcely buy a win when they had their original, prissy logo and uniforms. After they changed to a much tougher persona, they started picking up steam and are now a regular contender.

The pink and blue uniform in the cartoon above is a nod to that idea, of course. I wrote the cartoon because I thought the concept of playing sports in glass shoes was sort of funny, and most markets print Bizarro is black and white so that was the end of the joke. In color, I think it’s a bit of a nice bump to add the matching colors of the Fairy GMother and his uniform.

Hope everyone had a swell holiday week. The cartoon I ran on Xmas day this year attracted tons of hate mail. More on that subject middle of next week when I post the cartoon.


10 thoughts on “>Shoes Make the Man

  1. >Dan, Thanks for the vegan responses, even taking time out to talk to an ass is cool. Maybe ill clean up my blogging for the new year. I think personally as much as speaking out about being vegan, you and Ashley should also talk the myths we are taught to believe then.Happy new year

  2. >I know you’re the genius but I would just like to note that I think the comic would have been a little wittier if the fairy godmother said “Now you can go off to the big bowl.” playing off of the ball situation in the cinderella story.

  3. >hatemail? on christmas? that is so wrong in so many ways i lost count…peace be with you bro. have you got any club dates in Indy?

  4. >hey Dan!I’m a huge fan of your cartoons!here in Italy we have a weekly puzzle magazine called ‘La Settimana Enigmistica’ and it regularly features your art!Great to finally get a chance to write fan-boy type stuff to you, sir.Cordially,TF

  5. >I love football, too, for the reason you cited…it brings back awesome memories of growing up. I spent many Sunday afternoons watching football with my Dad, who steadfastly denies he ever falls asleep in front of any games. I once painted his toenails while was comatose in front of a Bronco game. He still insisted he was JUST RESTING.And speaking of which, once they Broncos ditched that horrible old bright orange and bright blue uniform they immediately won the Super Bowl. Go figure.As for openly gay professional athletes…I would love to see it as well. This is totally hysterical, but also very true. If gay teenagers could decide to make themselves straight, they could also make themselves 7’2″.

  6. >Sayotte,No prob, happy to discussJym,Sorry you couldn’t make it to the book store. The Chicken Lady was a nice surrogate, though. : )Anonymous,You are totally right, where were you when I was writing that comic?Doug,I’m in Indy for the week of Jan19 to 25 at Eiteljorn Museum.TF,Thanks for popping by, I love Italy, have been there many times.Penny,Hysterical song, thanks for the link!

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