See-Um-Syrup Wedding


Bizarro is brought to you today by Todd the Dinosaur.

An important film in 1967 was The Graduate. If you did not know this, find out about it; there’s a hole in your education. After you’ve found out about it, find out about Mrs. Butterworth’s syrup, then read this cartoon. When all of that prerequisite knowledge is in place, I believe you will find that this cartoon will change the shape of your mouth in a positive way. (Another thing that might have the same effect is the fact that someone did this to their child.

The cartoon was conceived by my friend and colleague, Wayno, and while in many cases he and I will bounce ideas back and forth before I draw them, this one was perfect just as he designed it so I didn’t change a thing. If you want to read Wayno’s bragging about his genius, click here. (Kidding. He is very humble.)

The prerequisite knowledge necessary for the next cartoon is this: The Invisible Man is a character often seen (ha!) in films but first conceived by H.G.Wells in his 1897 novella of the same name. Wow, he was ahead of his time. Little did he know that x number of years later, people would, in fact, have the ability to make themselves invisible. (I’ll fill in the number when it happens.) The other prerequisite knowledge is that “No-See-Ums” are tiny insects that bite people and itch like crazy. They breed near water, so lakes and beaches are a favorite hangout. Because they are so small, you almost never catch a glimpse of one, hence the name.

Saturday is a popular day for weddings so here is a wedding cartoon for today, Saturday. The prerequisite knowledge necessary for understanding this gag is that women sometimes marry men for their money. Often, these women are young and attractive and the men are old and sick. This enables the bride to have complete control of the money sooner. This will never happen to me because a) I don’t have any money and likely never will, and b) I’ve been married twice and am not stupid enough to do it again. It’s not that the pair of marriages on my resume were/are awful, it’s just that I don’t see the point of ever doing it again. Sex and companionship are plenty, why drag a judge and a bunch of lawyers into it?

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, Bizarro Brigade. And if you are a very old, sick man married to a young, gold-digging woman, hang on another day just to spite her! You can do it, man!

NOT invisible are the thousands of Bizarro cartoons you can get on the gillions of products by clicking here.





6 thoughts on “See-Um-Syrup Wedding

  1. To Dan Piraro: I want to let you know how much I enjoy your space every week. You have such an intelligent wit, & such unusual drawings. I look forward to them every week, & constantly surprised at your remarkable ideas. I have just found your blog, & enjoyed reading the one about 2 movies, with which, as a senior I am familiar.

    Please keep up the good work. Thanks, Joya .

      • I actually did that (colander helmet) once to ride my motorcycle to the market about a mile down the road. I used a short bungee cord to hold it on my head. Needless to say I was caught at it by one of NY’s Finest….. He actually laughed and me and told me not to be so stupid again and let me finish my pasta run!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *