Puppet and His Dummy


bz panel 05-31-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Introduction to Proctology.

Ventriloquistm is a favorite topic of many gag cartoonists and I’ve done quite a few over my nine-decade career. I’m pretty proud of the simplicity of this one, though. It leaves the reader to imagine the ridiculous voice the man is using as he answers questions through his dummy. This causes me to smile with my mouth. I also like the green leisure suits.

Just for kicks, here are a few more of my favorite ventriloquist gags from the past. (My computer is currently unable to post ventriloquism gags from the future.)

bz VENTRILQ 01-29-10Bz panel color 08-09-07 bz panel color 11-30-06


17 thoughts on “Puppet and His Dummy

    • I expect some analysts will attribute this 9 decade revelation to Time Inflation, due to the recent trends in gigaherzing technology and tachnology. I suspect, however, that the Invisible Hand of the Cartoonist Puppeteer conspiracists are onto something . . .

  1. Yeah, that one gave me a good laugh! (BTW: My favorite of your “simple” ones is the cartoon where the guy asks: “Where did we go wrong, Nora?” and the woman says: “I’m not Nora.” — Perfect!)

    The cartoon at the bottom is fabulous as well. Those faces! Priceless!


    Proctologists and ventriloquists seem to have something in common. Just see where their hand goes! There must be quite a few ways to capitalize on that! (A proctologist/ventriloquist convention? :))

    Or imagine a ventriloquist at the proctologist’s (who has just informed the ventriloquist what he’s going to do next), and the dummy says to his ventriloquist: “Don’t worry! It’ll feel a bit unpleasant first, but you’ll get used to it … “)

    Has there been a cartoon of a ventriloquist yet in which his dummy has a (little) dummy also? The ventriloquist could sit on a shrink’s couch and inform the shrink — as the red faced bigger dummy argues with his little dummy — that he is totally sane, but his dummy needs help! (Seems so obvious! But what about a black dummy on a white ventriloquist’s hand, and the dummy says to him: “Are you sure there was no mix-up?” — Or a ventriloquist with a silly outfit and the sulky dummy says: “I’m not going to wear THAT hat!”)

    Before I close (and while I have you still thinking about proctologists) — have you ever wondered why Spider-Man shoots his web from his wrists? A realistic Spider-Man would have his spinerets, uhm, elsewhere! (I guess I need to see a shrink myself: Dragonfly Boy with his glaring butt, Superman with his powerful and dangerous farts, and now all THAT. I never knew I was that “anal” … ).

    If you care to know how the weather is over here in Germany, just click on this photo of our very own Spider-Kraut (okay, it’s just a shot from the filming of the new Spider-Man movie … )


      • Our darkest period of history has really made it hard for us to greet people on the other side of the street — especially when photographed! (We should invent something new, like jumping up and down with our arms tightly on our sides, smilingly shaking our heads). :)

  2. Incredible! A ventriloquist gag + mime mockery = cartoon Nirvana. (I am bowing to you, but you’ll just have to trust me). Well done!

  3. you forgot the one from 5 september 2011. it’s jeff dunham and peanut at the psychiatrist’s office, with the doctor saying, “this has been a good session, mr. dunham. would you mind stepping into the waiting room for a few minutes so i can speak with peanut?” i saved it, it’s so funny. i’m saving “ventriloquist mime” because ALL mimes are sexy.

  4. Here’s a completely unrelated to your post pun: A hair salon called Cut and Paste: One hairdresser cuts the hair of one client, another hair dresser promptly uses that hair to paste it onto the balding head of another. There’s bound to be a hair salon actually called that anyway by now… ;)

    • Psht, I thought you didn’t post these…. now you leave me open to ridicule with a bad pun suggestion…. I feel like being stabbed in the back with a pickle…

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