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Dummy Ashes Jowl Reading

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Bizarro is brought to you today by Grandpa Spent Too Much Time Alone in the Basement.

 

After all these years I still enjoy coming up with a new angle on one of the traditional cartoon cliches. I started with the idea of a ventriloquist’s dummy begging and then my lovely and enchanting girlfriend, Olive Oyl, and I riffed for a bit before coming up with the right line for his sign. I can’t believe this idea hasn’t been done before but I couldn’t find one on the Truthernet, so I did it. (more…)

“Funny”

bizarro 04-20-14 hedrBizarro 04-20-14 WEB(Click any eyeball to see the cartoon grow to the size of a larger cartoon!)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Jazz Age Pickles.

I’ve drawn today’s cartoon in the style of the old romance comic books, which is not my usual fare, as you regular Jazz Pickles know. I don’t always do cartoons with a social message like this one, but it isn’t all that unusual for me, either. (more…)

Eggs Duo Sticks Eggs

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Bizarro is brought to you by No Thanks, I’ve Already Got One.

 

My good buddy and known associate, Wayno of Pittsburgh, wrote this gag for me because I have restless leg syndrome. My eggs are fine, though. Any way you look at it, this is a good yolk. (As in “joke”. Get it? ahahahahahah) (more…)

Flying Dead Geezer Brain

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Bizarro is brought to you today by But What If I Have One?

 

 

As funny cartoons about dogs go, I think this one holds its own. What’s funnier than a dog trying to fly? As I write this, I’m pondering whether I’d rather have a dog that can fly or one that just stands up and flaps his arms. I think the latter would be more fun, although the former would be more lucrative. (more…)

1 Weird Trick

Bizarro 04-13-14 hedrBizarro 04-13-14 WEBonetip-300x278Bizarro is brought to you today by Truth in Advertising.

If you’ve been loitering on the Interwebs recently, you’ve likely noticed a ton of these badly written and drawn ads for “1 weird trick” to do everything from reducing your belly fat to building muscle to learning a foreign language. As painful as it was for me to draw and write in that style, here are a few of my own suggestions of weird tricks. Follow them at your own risk. (Kids under 18: Ask your parents before chopping off body parts, being imprisoned in a foreign country, or playing with poisonous snakes.) (more…)

Watch Kitty Tax Guano

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Bizarro is brought to you today by One-Stop Shopping For Female Psycho Killers.

My girlfriend, Olive Oyl, and I are going to a “half-Halloween” party in a week. That’s where you pick a weekend about in the middle between two Halloweens, and a group of you show up at a designated bar or whatever, wearing costumes. It’s based on the theory that Halloween is too much fun to only have once a year. (more…)

Falling Depth Arm Philosophy

bz panel 04-07-14bz strip 04-07-14bz panel 04-08-14bz panel 04-09-14Bizarro is brought to you today by But I’m Vegan.

 

Happy early April, Jazz Pickles. I’ve been as busy as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs lately as I plan to escape Bizarro International Headquarters next week for a bit of time off. Yes, even super-human cartoonists need time off from comedy from time to time, so I’ll be going where nothing is ever funny: Oklahoma. (more…)

Tentacles

Bizarro 04-06-14 hedrWEB Bizarro 04-06-14 WEB(To be with bigger cartoons, click on any tentacle.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Kickin’ It Old School.

It’s election season in the U.S. again, somehow, and the usual crop of ne’er do wells is up and running. I used to follow politics closely but in recent years I’ve thought better of it and I’ve been happier for the decision. Accordingly, I thought this cartoon would be a good lesson for any alien species considering taking over the planet. (Side note: Can you spot your Grand Imperial Exalted Jazz Poobah in this cartoon? If so, put a few bucks in the tip jar at right to celebrate your cleverness!) (more…)

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