(Find yourself wanting more embiggenation out of any of these cartoons? This desire can be satisfied by the mere clickage of the images.)
Happy holidays and other things, Jazz Pickles! I hope you’re having (or have had) a lovely holiday month and that the good times will continue to roll into the new year. As a special holiday treat, I’ve put some of my favorite Bizarro holiday cartoons of the past behind the blue links in this post, so be sure to click those and claim your BONUS CHUCKLES––you’ve earned them! (Don’t ask me how you’ve earned them. I’m only pretending to know you.) Let’s start with this mash-up of competing mythologies.
I don’t believe in psychic powers but I’m open to the idea that some might exist. I’m fairly comfortable with the notion that the vast majority of people selling themselves as psychics are either charlatans or self-delusional, but it’s always possible that the mind can do things we are not yet able to understand, so I remain sort of barely open minded. (more…)
Regular readers of my weekly posts will know that Olive Oyl and I moved Rancho Bizarro from Los Angeles to San Miguel de Allende a week ago. With most of our stuff still on a moving van between California and Mexico and no wifi in the house for the first several days, my post last week did not include all of the cartoons from that week because I really hate sitting in adorable cafes in foreign countries typing for hours instead of looking around at the weird place to which I decided to move my life. So, now that I’ve got wifi and am typing from the boring comfort of my own home, here in this post you’ll find today’s big, wide Sunday cartoon and title panel (above) and all of the Monday-through-Saturday cartoons from the last two weeks. And as if that weren’t too much, I’m adding some pics and commentary from our now home in Mexico at the end of the post. Yowza! That’s a lot of value for the price. (Free) (more…)
(Click any cartoon for the full embiggenation experience.)
As I mentioned yesterday in a Facadebook post, Olive Oyl and I moved Rancho Bizarro to Mexico a couple of days ago. I’ve been working ahead on Bizarro for many weeks, and for months O2 has been attending to the 785 zagilliobytes of information that must be researched, filed, signed, processed, and anticipated in order to move your life, pets, and possessions to a foreign country. So even two days later, we feel a bit like we’ve just collapsed at the end of a marathon. Although when people run marathons they usually don’t bring their cats.
Today’s cartoon would have been more appropriate around Columbus Day, but given that the United States accidentally elected a reality show host as president and given his attitudes toward non-white people, it seems relevant now, too. I’ve long despised our tradition of honoring Christopher Columbus with a holiday; he was by all accurate accounts a terrible person who neither proved the world was round nor was the first European to discover the Americas (as I was erroneously taught in elementary school in the 1960s), and he murdered more than 100,000 indigenous people for commercial gain. (more…)
The number over my signature in today’s Old West Extravaganza tells us that there are seven Secret Symbols to hunt for and I think I might have even gotten the count correct this time. Lately, there have been a spate of inaccurate symbol counts and I apologize for that. Like I used to tell my 7th grade math teacher, “What’s with your obsession with absolute accuracy all the time? Geez.” (more…)
Today’s cartoon has 8secret symbols and a handful of background gags that are fun, so you’ll want to embiggenate it. (My favorite background gag is the truck.) The main gag is a bit of a populist joke––to borrow an oft-used term of late––because most people seem to dislike the cliche, public street mime, the sort I’ve depicted here. I’ve long been on record as a person who finds that clowns, mimes, and street performers of all kinds just make me uncomfortable. I go out of my way to avoid and ignore them. My apologies to any readers who are street performers. I don’t mean to disparage your chosen career or hobby, it just doesn’t work for me. Kind of like door-to-door evangelists. (more…)
This sawmill cartoon is a bit on the fringe so don’t be too hard on yourself if it made you scratch your head.
Sometime after 9/11 (the infamously tragic one, not the one two months ago) the New York City Metropolitan Transit Agency (the folks that run the buses and subways) started a public safety campaign urging citizens to report suspicious behavior with the slogan, “If you see something, say something”. The campaign was later adopted by the U.S. Department of Homeland Security and used nationally. A longtime Bizarro Jazz Pickle suggested turning the phrase to what is displayed on the sign above. It made me chuckle, so I turned it into this cartoon. As a tip of the hat to the contributor, I named the sawmill after him. (more…)
Wow, what a week, Jazz Pickles. First, let’s discuss today’s Sunday cartoon, shown above. As a residence of the Los Angeles area for the past five years, traffic is always on my mind. This is a place with too many cars, which is why my beloved Olive Oyl (O2) and I ride motorcycles whenever we can. California is the only state where it is legal to ride between lanes and in LA traffic, it is often the only way to get home from the grocery store before tomorrow. (more…)