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Classical Omission

In yesterday’s post of the previous week’s cartoons, the above comic was accidentally omitted. I did everything the same way I always do and grabbed my entire week’s worth of cartoons en masse for uploading, yet this one somehow didn’t make it to the other side. I didn’t notice it was missing until one of my cherished Jazz Pickles asked about it in a comment today. Thanks, E. A. J.!
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Flaccid Headwear

(Embiggenate your experience by clicking a cartoon.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Smart Hat.

When I was growing up in the late 1900s, my parents didn’t believe in spending the extra money to get the name-brand fashion trends my sisters and I needed if we hoped to have any social traction at school. This taught us important lessons such as: Kids in Levis® and Dingo® boots are not always kind to kids in Montgomery Ward jeans and “Dango” boots from Larry’s shoe barn. In the cartoon above, it’s no mystery which style of balloon hat I would have been wearing around the park.
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Funny Bun

(If you’re feeling a hankering for embiggenation, click a cartoon.)

I had a wonderful time concocting the above cartoon in spite of the fact that I knew it would doubtless be at the expense of at least a few of my readers. Sorry about that male bun wearers! As a person who has embraced some unusual fashion choices over the years, I have no right to poke fun at the fashion choices of others but what fun would that be? Then again, if you’re going to go with a man bun, you should probably have a good sense of humor about it as I always have with my Dali mustache.
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Wet A While

(Your private embiggenation experience awaits you. Just click a cartoon.)

I’ve got family in town this week so I’m taking as much of a week-off as I can. I’m going to make this post short as a result and hope you, my reader, will understand.

Here’s a cartoon about the Moses myth where he parts the Red Sea and escapes the Egyptians. Legend has it that the whole “flight from Egypt” was a long and grueling journey but a little gravity-free swimming might have been a lovely––if temporary––diversion.
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Flying Mammals

(To escape the cruelties of a reality without embiggenation, click the bat’s nose.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Not Jazz Pickles.

I’ve done a lot of cartoons about superheroes but they never possess the qualities that I loved about them as a kid: power, intelligence, strength, coolness, etc.  Somehow, I find it much more enjoyable to poke fun at them than to draw comics that glorify them as heroes.
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Early Exits

(If the kids are screaming “Embiggenate it!” click the image and tell them to shut up.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Halloween Costume Tips for Babies.

I’ve learned through personal experience that meetings with the police can be fraught with danger both to one’s personal safety and freedom, so I make it a habit to cut them short. The gentleman in the cartoon above has done so, too, though it can be assumed that the police he was meeting did not agree to his leaving when he did. This happens.
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Parroting

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(For they whom seek embiggenation, click thee thou pointer henceforthwidth.)

I have wanted a talking parrot since I was a little child and as an adult, I looked into getting one. Since I’m not the impulsive type who runs out and spends a lot of money on an animal without knowing what it would be like to live with, I read a fair amount about keeping parrots as pets before doing anything about it. I’m glad I did because I found out that I would have hated living with a parrot and it would likely have hated living with me. To make the whole thing worse, they live about as long as humans so you’re either stuck with a neurotic, unhappy prisoner for the rest of your life, or you have to look for someone to pawn it off on when you get tired of it, which isn’t fair to the parrot or the person you’re passing it off to.
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Sole Mate

 

(Explore the exciting world of embiggenation by clicking a comic.)

This was another raucous week of hate mail and negative comments over one of my cartoons with an overtly political message, which I’ll discuss later in this post. I hesitate to call them “political comics” because I’m not an editorial cartoonist and my cartoons are not in the style of typical editorial cartoons. As I’ve mentioned before, cartoons are sold to newspapers as either “funny” or “editorial”, and those of us in the “funny” category are expected to stay away from heavily political content. In 99% of my comics over my 33-year career, I’ve kept to that rule but the absurdity of our current president and his administration have inspired and compelled me to an occasional political cartoon.
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Canine Confessions

(Rather than just screaming EMBIGGENATE, DAMN YOU! try clicking on the image.)

There is some debate over whether dogs actually feel and understand guilt or if, over the many thousands of years they have lived alongside humans they have simply evolved to pretend to be contrite when we express anger. As much as I love dogs and want to attribute higher emotional and mental functions to them, I’ve come to believe it’s an act.
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Big Something

(The embiggenation of some of these images can be caused by clicking on them.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by America’s Next President If I Have My Way.

I’ve been thinking a lot about Bigfoot lately, although I’ve no idea why. In the cartoon above, we see that Sasquatch belongs to a family in which each member has one oversized thing. (Get your mind out of the gutter.)
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