Page 4 of 43« First...23456...102030...Last »

Chiropractic Tarzan

Bizarro 11-30-14 hedrWEB Bizarro 11-30-14 WEB (Click the images to make them look bigger with suddeness.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Nothing a Can of Gasoline and a Match Wouldn’t Cure.

Sorry for the missing posts over the weekend. The site was wearing it’s cranky pants and wouldn’t let me post.

This is the most literal example of “gallows humor” you may ever see. And in the end, it isn’t dark at all, which sort of takes it out of the category altogether. Oh, the contradictions of life.
(more…)

Evil Turkey Stuffing Aliens

bz panel 11-24-14bz strip 11-24-14bz panel 11-25-14bz strip 11-25-14bz panel 11-26-14bz strip 11-26-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Being Your Own Pet.

An email buddy of mine, Michael Lagace, sent me the idea of an “evil Knievel” twin and this is how I used it. I had a good time drawing Evel, as he was one of my childhood heroes. The kids in my neighborhood and I used to build ramps out of plywood and stacks of old tires or whatever we could get hold of to prop it up, then jump our bicycles over it at great speed. Yes, it was dangerous, and bones were broken. For all I know, Knievel may be the person for whom the ubiquitous statement, “Don’t try this at home!” was invented.
(more…)

Academic Bludgeon Duck

Bizarro 11-23-14 hdrWEB Bizarro 11-23-14 WEBBizarro is brought to you today by Things That Add to Your Worship.

My effervescent and sublime life partner, Olive Oyl, came up with the idea for today’s cartoon. The breadth of her skills continues to amaze me and I consider myself a very lucky man.

If you’ve ever played the enduring classic board game, “Clue,” you’ll doubtless recognize Professor Plum as he enters the Office of Admission and admits what he’s done. I got a good chuckle from it and I hope you do, too. Plus, even though the drawing is not particularly complex, there are still 5 secret symbols to search for. Click the image for a larger view.
(more…)

Love Amputation Kids Computers

bz panel 11-20-14bz strip 11-20-14bz panel 11-21-14bz strip 11-21-14bz panel 11-22-14bz strip 11-22-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Computer Anatomy.

As my regular readers know, I’ve been through two divorces and cannot recommend the experience. All that is in the distant past now but now and then a nice divorce gag occurs to me. When your job is coming up with a fresh gag 365 days a year, anything that goes into your head is likely to come back out later as a cartoon or twelve.
(more…)

Bear Blog Mouse Eskimo

bz panel 11-17-14bz strip 11-17-14bz panel 11-18-14bz strip 11-18-14bz panel 11-19-14bz strip 11-19-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Freudian Typo.

Insider tip: Don’t bother calling Teddy Bear Headquarters on a Monday. Those dudes are some picnic-loving freaks.

 

 

 

 

 

Insider tip: Don’t use a therapist who has a blog on which he features highlights from each week’s therapy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Insider tip: Mice taxis are notoriously inefficient. But when you’re spending your life in a rodent prison, it’s worth a try.
(more…)

Butts, Knock-Offs, Cosplay

bz panel 11-13-14bz strip 11-13-14bz panel 11-14-14bz strip 11-14-14bz panel 11-15-14bz strip 11-15-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Useful Government Institutions.

I thought this “Rear Admiral” gag was a harmless bit of slapstick fun but at least one reader who left a comment thought it was “absolutely classless especially around  veterans day.” (That person must REALLY hate Beetle Baily.)  I generally tend to think that no one is above having a bit of fun poked at them, especially those in authority. What do you think? Should military personnel be held sacred when it comes to cartoons?
(more…)

Cluck Brag Kiss Shout

bz panel 11-10-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Food Discrimination.

Here’s a lovely pastoral view of a truly free-range chicken farm where some of its residents are planning a vacation. It is nothing like where real chickens come from.

 

bz strip 11-10-14bz panel 11-11-14bz strip 11-11-14bz panel 11-12-14bz strip 11-12-14

 

 

 

I’ve been giving a lot of thought recently about the important things in life and have decided that the amount of money and “things” you have isn’t one of them.
(more…)

Funeral Rash Hitman

Bizarro is brought to you today by No, Don’t.

bz panel 11-07-14

I particularly like this first cartoon about a unique funeral. It’s got all the things I like in a cartoon: absurdity, irreverence, a clergyman, towels, a funny picture, and, though it seems this specialized ceremony went pretty smoothly up to this point, what happens next is up to the reader to imagine.
(more…)

Quintuple Cavalcade of Comedy

Bizarro is brought to you today by Tiny Alien.

bz panel 11-03-14bz strip 11-03-14

Monday: Dogs are funny. Dogs without electronics are just sad. (Get a print of this cartoon.)

bz panel 11-04-14bz strip 11-04-14

Tuesday: I was on a jury once for a one-day civil trial and it was boring as hell. I can imagine after a long trial wishing that someone would kill me. (Get a print of this cartoon.)
(more…)

Travel Secrets Therapy

Bizarro 11-02-14 hdrWEB Bizarro 11-02-14 WEB(For enbiggened views of any of these images, click on any human hand.)

 

Bizarro is brought to you today by My Daughter, Krelspeth as Hall and Oates.

If you’re planning a trip to Europe, be sure to catch some of the sites mentioned below. Anyone sending me a photo of themselves in front of one of these Old World treasures will win a signed photo of me being carried piggyback by the Pope. (Offer good while supplies last.) (more…)

Page 4 of 43« First...23456...102030...Last »