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Surviving Magic Alien Harry

(To see the above celebrities in all their TMZ glory, click on Snooki’s butt.)

Bizarro is brought to you by Freak Shows.

I admit I’ve never seen any of the “Survivor” TV shows. I’m not a big fan of that sort of reality game-show stuff, but I get the gist. It was therefore simple (and a LOT of fun) to imagine one in which my favorite celebrities to despise are left on an island to fight it out amongst them selves and never be heard from again. Simon Cowell is one I missed. Can’t stand that guy. I didn’t want to mess with caricatures, but if you click on the image and blow it up, you should be able to spot Paris, Bruce Jenner, Kim Kardashian, Richard Simmons, Donald Trump, and Snooki. The others are just cast members of Jersey Shore or lesser Kardashians. (more…)

Pet Parking Eunuch Humping Loaf

Bizarro is brought to you today by Parenting.

I took some time off to travel but am happy to be back in my captain’s chair here at Bizarro International Headquarters.

Accordingly, here are a passel of cartoons to catch you up to date. First up is a cartoon that proved popular among readers. Personally, I never use my first pet’s name as a security question because, although I loved the dog, I never liked her name: “Penny.” I don’t have anything against the name per se, but my older sister picked it and so it seemed feminine to me. I was rooting for “Spike” or “Killer.” She looked not unlike the dog in this cartoon, except that her spots were brown. Like you care. (more…)

Corpse Lineup Crackpot Signage

Bizarro is brought to you today by a Terrible Mime.

Good day, Jazz Pickles. There have been countless cartoons done about mimes but I’m very proud of this one because it seems to me to be a new angle and we cartoonists love coming up with a new angle on a common cartoon cliche.  It also has the added benefit of being one of those cartoons that you don’t get immediately until you look closely. I love that kind of humor and my Jazz Pickles tell me they do, too. (more…)

Knock Wrap

Bizarro is brought to you today by Simple Concepts.

I don’t normally post as often as I have in recent days but this cartoon about the delivery man has more than a few readers puzzled, so I thought I’d explain it here and just direct all questioners to this blog.

There is no secret meaning to this, it’s just that a tiny person lives in a tiny home and the doorbell is too loud for their tiny ears. A bit esoteric, yes, but that’s what my Jazz Pickles like. (more…)

Wolf Shrink Valet

Bizarro is brought to you today by Barking Backpack.

We here at BizarroComics Blog caught up with cartoonist Dan Piraro in his Los Angeles hideaway for an exclusive interview about his career.

BCB: What makes you so cool?

DP: Gosh, am I cool? Thanks, I don’t really think of myself as cool. I’m just me.(makes “aw, shucks” face) (more…)

Submarine Water Dog

(If you find yourself wondering what this cartoon would look like bigger, click the taxi’s license plate.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by My Short Career in Crime Fighting.

I’m posting this cartoon a few hours before it is officially published so I can’t say for sure, but I anticipate some questions on it. This seems to me to be one of those cartoons that some people will want to find a “deeper” meaning for. But there is none. If you turn a bus sign upside down, it says “sub” (sort of.) So it’s just one of those odd visual things that amuses me. For those of you keeping track of utterly trivial information in some sort of a stalker’s scrapbook, the street scene was drawn without reference from my memory of my old neighborhood in Brooklyn. (more…)

Less Than a Dozen Cartoons

Bizarro is brought to you today by Eye Jinx.

Are you a person who enjoys things? I am too. Here’s something I hope you’ll enjoy: between five and seven cartoons.

The first one is about how Newton discovered gravity when an apple conked him on the noggin. The truth is, the whole story is a myth. Newton was not hit by an apple, but a grand piano falling from the fourth floor of those old, crumbly European buildings they have everywhere over there. The blow to his head caused him to go crazy and make up a bunch of sciency stuff about gravity and some other things. It was hilarious. (more…)

Feline Herp Loser Wrinkles

Bizarro is brought to you today by Runaway Wiener.

I got a question or two about about this cat/dog cartoon. One person wondered if the gag was that the woman is seeing a cat doctor. People who live with cats, however, will likely immediately understand that this is a depiction of a cat who is so pompous that he only sees his caregiver by appointment. Hahahahahahahahaha. (I’ve lived with many cats.) (more…)

Dr. Sheik Rabbit Highway Star Burqa

Bizarro is brought to you today by Super Mistakes.

It’s been a week since I’ve posted because I had to get ready to leave town for my show in Washington D.C. over the weekend, fly there, do the show, then come home. I’ve done all that now so I’m back at headquarters and blogging like a chimp with a new laptop. (more…)

Nightmare Depression Restroom Tornado

(To see this cartoon all big like an elephant, click on the cable connector on the back of the TV)

Bizarro is brought to you by Nightmares.

We’ve all felt sorry for a small chair as an extremely heavy person sits on it, and that empathy for inanimate objects was what led me to muse about things common household furniture might fear or dread. Of course, I know that inanimate objects are not sentient and have no feelings but by “chair,” I mean “child,” and who hasn’t felt sorry for a child being sat upon by a large adult? Perhaps my sensitivity in this area comes from personal experience; my parents were very poor when my siblings and I were young and could not afford furniture, so they sat on us.. They couldn’t afford children, either, but until they figured out where we were coming from, they just kept having them. It was painful at times, yes, but it also brought us closer together as a family. (more…)

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