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Undies Fish TV Laptop

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Bizarro is brought to you today by Latest Disguise Technology.

 

Ever wondered if Tarzan wore underwear? Neither had I until I did, and it resulted in this cartoon.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This barroom cartoon is a collaboration with my good friend and known associate, Wayno of Pittsburgh. I’ve been told by a few readers that I got the symbol count wrong on this vertical version, it should be 7 instead of 6. The strip is wrong, too. I only count 4. Sometimes my counting ain’t so good, and neither is my editor’s. Wayno blathers eloquently about this cartoon and his original sketch here. (more…)

Chomp Stroll Eat Naked

Bizarro 06-01-14 HedrBizarro 06-01-14 WEBbz panel 05-29-14 bz strip 05-29-14bz panel 05-30-14bz strip 05-30-14bz panel 05-31-14bz strip 05-31-14(For a bigger, more better experience, click on any image to enbiggen it.)

Bizarro is brought to you by Who Wouldn’t Want This Done To Their Mouth?

This week was kookoobananas and left me without time to keep up with my blog posts. So here now, are all the cartoons from Wednesday until today. (more…)

Square Parrot Prayer

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Bizarro is brought to you today by My New Career in Mexico.

 

My friend, Edwin, gave me the idea for this cartoon by showing up to dinner dressed like this. His T-shirt didn’t say this but his mouth did, so here’s a comic about it. In fairness to Edwin, I should add that he is anything but a square.
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Archer Troglodytes Chasing Download Destruction

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Bizarro is brought to you today by Appetizing Image.

My first offering this week is a collaboration with my good friend and colleague, Wayno of Pittsburgh. I like this gag a lot. For the sake of accuracy, I have William reading the fourth line, in case you’re wondering which colors coincide with the names of the apples he is identifying. (more…)

Amputee Gore Explosion Unibat

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I like this batch of three cartoons quite a lot and got some interesting mail regarding two of them.

The first cartoon about the Scarecrow’s difficulty with the horses of Oz attracted this email comment: “I enjoy Bizarro very much but as an old retired newspaper editor I can’t resist commenting on today’s strip.  Obviously you are a city kid.  Otherwise you would know that a straw man would never be eaten by horses.  Horses do not eat straw.  Horses eat hay.  Horses bed down in straw.  Horses poop in straw (which might be worse than being eaten).  But horses do not eat straw.” (more…)

Eggs Duo Sticks Eggs

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Bizarro is brought to you by No Thanks, I’ve Already Got One.

 

My good buddy and known associate, Wayno of Pittsburgh, wrote this gag for me because I have restless leg syndrome. My eggs are fine, though. Any way you look at it, this is a good yolk. (As in “joke”. Get it? ahahahahahah) (more…)

Falling Depth Arm Philosophy

bz panel 04-07-14bz strip 04-07-14bz panel 04-08-14bz panel 04-09-14Bizarro is brought to you today by But I’m Vegan.

 

Happy early April, Jazz Pickles. I’ve been as busy as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs lately as I plan to escape Bizarro International Headquarters next week for a bit of time off. Yes, even super-human cartoonists need time off from comedy from time to time, so I’ll be going where nothing is ever funny: Oklahoma. (more…)

Smiley Fez Icing Smut

bz panel 03-31-14bz strip 03-31-14bz panel 04-01-14bz strip 04-01-14bz panel 04-02-14bz strip 04-02-14Bizarro is brought to you today by A Good Read.

 

As I’ve mentioned here before, I design and draw my cartoons to fit into the vertical “panel” format, then reposition that art and add to it as necessary for the horizontal “strip” version. So I think most of my gags work better as panels, but in this case, the strip works better because we get a better sense of the speeding taxi. In both frames, however, the hapless texter gets flattened. (more…)

Ape Creep Athlete Finger

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Bizarro is brought to you today by How Hair Grows.

I’ve been watching the new Cosmos series on Fox television recently and it’s really wonderful. I highly recommend it to anyone of any age with a working brain. They discuss evolution quite a bit, of course, since it is the way the entire universe more-or-less works, so this gag appealed to me. (more…)

Bubble Curtain Bear Drugs

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Monday’s cartoon is the brain fruit of my known associate, Wayno of Pittsburgh. I’ve seen these e-cigarettes around but I don’t really know how they work. For a while, you could smoke them indoors since, I presume, they pose no second-hand smoke risk or smell, but now they are beginning to ban them indoors like real cigarettes, I suppose because people have been brainwashed in the U.S. for so many decades to believe that smoking, or even pretending to, is the most dangerous thing any person can do short of cleaning a gun with the barrel in your mouth. (more…)

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