Fortune Butch Safety Bus

bz panel 08-21-14bz strip 08-21-17bz panel 08-22-14bz strip 08-22-14bz panel 08-23-14bz strip 08-23-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Infamous Vessel of Calming Liquid.

Here’s one of my not-so-rare cameo appearances in Bizarro, along with my amazing womanpartner (girlfriend just seems too juvenile at our age and experience,) Olive Oyl. I don’t have a Smart Car, but both she and I have tiny little Fiat 500s, hers is all electric. And neither of us have had our cars crushed by SUVs (knock on wood.)  The electric Fiat is a terrific car with amazing pickup and speed and I’ll likely be switching over soon. It’s actually faster and more peppy than my gas-powered one! And you can go 100 miles on a full charge, which only costs $4. These cars are only available in California and Oregon, I guess because those are the only places with ample public charging stations to support the kind of sales they need to make it worth their investment. And California gives you a $2500 rebate for getting one. Can’t beat it. (more…)

Burning Desires

bz panel 08-16-13bz strip 08-16-13Bizarro is brought to you today by WILF.

I’ve had this gag on deck for months but resisted drawing it because it is so labor intensive. I’m glad I finally did, though, because I really love the gag.

I sat on a jury once in a civil trial where a guy who was barely tapped in bumper-to-bumper, rush-hour traffic was trying to get money for whiplash. It was a comically clumsy, sit-com attempt to cash in on a very minor traffic accident. One other juror and I voted “not guilty,” but the others wanted to give the guy in the phony neck brace the money. Some of the memorable quotes I heard from three other jurors while deliberating follow: “I think he’s lying too, but when you make a mistake, you gots to pay.” “He might be lying but I was taught it is wrong to judge.” “Aren’t we bound by law to believe everything he says under oath?” This is a true story. (more…)