Fly By

bz panel 02-01-14bz strip 02-01-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Alternative Marriages.

Since California is a big agricultural state and much of that is fruit, they’re really picky about letting people into the state with food items that might carry some kind of insect that is bad for local crops. I guess fruit flies are the ones I’ve heard most about. They don’t thoroughly search every car so I don’t know how well it works, but it does cause a traffic jam at the borders, which is always a good time to check your email and Twitter feed while you wait. (more…)

Wasted Wood

bz panel 07-16-13bz strip 07-16-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Tree Friends.

The last time I did a cartoon about talking trees, I got some email from readers who didn’t get it. This time I’m hoping the joke is self explanatory. Needless to say, I’m no fan of “Two and a Half Men,” which for those of you tuning in from an underground camp in Antarctica, is a sitcom on some American TV network. If you happen to be a fan, I hope I have not offended you. I don’t hate you, just that show. (more…)

Spoiled Elf Pizza Quadruped Roadway

 

Bizarro is brought to you today by Holiday Hangover.

I know that nobody is interested in Xmas anymore but I’ve been remiss in posting on this blog for the past week so I’m getting you caught up on what I’ve been up to in the cartoon wonderland in which I live.

If you’re like me (not a millionaire who buys cars for people on holidays) you’re likely very tired of the car commercials that encourage you to buy automobiles as gifts. If I saw a new Mercedes with a giant bow on it in the driveway of one of my neighbors on Xmas morning, I might take hostages. Or, at the very least, throw a couple of gift-wrapped bricks through the windows. (more…)

Weight Axe Curd Crook Band Strangle Furniture Amputee

Wow! This weekend’s post is a Jazztown Hootenanny Festival of Amusingness! SO many cartoons to catch up on!

(To imagine what this would look like larger, click the tiny wizard’s left ear. [His left, not your left.])

Bizarro is brought to you today by Sports Gardening.

I’m really happy with this Wizard of Oz collaboration with my good buddy, the King of Wordplay, Cliff Harris. Very elaborate art, very subtle gag. My favorite part of the art in this one is the glossy floor; I always enjoy coming up with special effects. By the way, if for some reason you don’t get this joke, the punch line lies in the abbreviations for “ounces” and “pounds.” By the way Part 2: the reason that the word “pounds” is abbreviated with letters that do not appear in the actual word is because they stand for “libra,” the scale. The reason “ounces” is abbreviated the way it is, is because the unit of measure we call an ounce was first used on the set of The Wizard of Oz, because they needed a way to measure the weight of the munchkins. I love trivia like that. (more…)