Drive By


(Make any of these images embiggenated by arching your back and clicking on them.)


Bizarro is brought to you today by Sneaking Up On A Glyptodon.

As you likely know, those “street view” images you can find online of just about any address in the civilized world are taken from contraptions attached to the tops of cars that just drive all over the world taking pictures of everything they pass. Some famously funny things have been captured by those pictures and they just lie quietly in wait on the Interwebs until people begin discovering them and spreading the word. There are gobs of pages dedicated to the funniest, strangest, most tragic things captured on Google Street View, which you can find by, of course, googling the topic.

Future of Cruising

Bizarro 02-28-16 HdrWEB

(To engage the embiggenation sequence count backwards from five to zero, then click any image.)Bizarro 02-28-16 WEB

Bizarro is brought to you today by Relationship Advice.

When I was a boy in the 1960s it was widely believed that flying cars would be a standard feature of my adulthood. The Jetsons promised it and it seemed inevitable. But the lousy driving habits of most people (science has determined that the exact percentage of crappy drivers on the road is everyone but you) have kept that from becoming a reality. Strangers would be crashing into your upstairs bedroom or fifteenth-floor apartment living room.

Brief Visits

Bizarro 01-05-14 HedrBizarro 01-05-14 WEB(To see any image on this page largerated, click on any object in any cartoon that starts with an “S”.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Baby Cheeses.

I was once on the back deck of a ship, tossing pieces of bread up into the air to watch seagulls catch them. After a while, I held them up in my hand and they would dip down and take them from me. Eventually, I decided to hold one in my mouth and, as predicted, a seagull swooped down and took it from my mouth. It also cut my lip pretty well with its razor-sharp, man-eating beak. The seagull in my title panel above was drawn from memory as the last thing I saw before I got this scar on my lip. Try it sometime, it’s fun. (more…)

Jazz Pickle Tiger

Bizarro is brought to you today by Lucky Gardener.

A few months ago, on a whim, I called my regular readers, “Bizarro Jazz Pickles.” People seemed to enjoy the moniker and it stuck, so I’ve used it numerous times since. Here now is a cartoon in which I use the term as an excuse to include a joke on the label. I trust my Jazz Pickles will enjoy it. If you do not currently know if you are a Jazz Pickle, here are the criteria: You have to be a regular reader and fan of my Bizarro comics. That’s all there is to it. Maybe you were already one and you didn’t know it. Some fans have been after me to design a Bizarro Jazz Pickle T-shirt but I have been remiss. It isn’t because I don’t care about your wardrobe, I most certainly do, but rather because I can’t think of anything wonderful enough. Anything obvious, like a pickle with sunglasses and a saxophone, just seems trite. So maybe one day I’ll have a flash of brilliance (not entirely out of the question, it almost happened once in 1972) and there will be a shirt for sale that will no doubt be snapped up by the dozens. As for this island cartoon, think of it the next time you’re trying to avoid running into your boss at the office, or your significant other at the local bath house. Things could always be worse. Stay crispy, Jazz Pickles! (more…)