Stomp Break Fall Stink

bz panel 09-25-14bz strip 09-25-14bz panel 09-26-14bz strip 09-26-14bz panel 09-27-14bz strip 09-27-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Scary Baby Man.

 

My clever friend in Germany, Michael Roth, had the idea that Ant-Man’s archenemy might be a guy with a big shoe to step on him. I added the picnic basket to drive home the point, as everyone knows that picnics attract ants.

The strip version of this one is turned sideways because I wanted readers to be able to see the entire image, but to shrink it down and place it vertically, as I normally would, would make it too small. I’ve done this a few other times, too, but not often. Here’s one now. (more…)

Drunken Veggies

Bizarro 03-23-14 hdr WEBBizarro 03-23-14 WEB(For a larger view of any image, click on something.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by The Road to the Election.

As a vegan, I enjoy a good salad bar from time to time, though I don’t frequent them. They are pretty boring, for sure. For some reason, the idea of what it would take to be a really amazing salad bar popped into my mind and this joke followed shortly thereafter. I’m very happy with the way the veggie characters turned out in the drawing. Also, along with having NINE secret symbols hidden therein, there is a Jazz Pickle, too, which isn’t one of my official symbols. Give yourself 75 bonus points if you find all nine, plus the pickle. (more…)

Playing Catchup

bz panel 02-26-14 bz panel 02-27-14bz panel 02-28-14 bz panel 02-29-14bz strip 02-29-14Bizarro is brought to you today by L.A. Celebrity Sighting.

 

My usual computer had a nervous breakdown last week and has been in the hospital. Since then, I’ve been using an old, outdated laptop made from logs held together with rope and tar. It’s been a challenge. I have, however, figured out how to get it to work on posting these blogs, in spite of the colonial-era operating system and browser, so here are the cartoons from last week that I’ve not been able to post until now. (more…)

Probing Question

bz panel 08-07-13bz strip 08-07-13Bizarro am brang to you today by Dangerous Fruit.

My daughter, Krelspeth and her man (my boyfriend-in-law), Klarf, are visiting me this week in L.A. so I’m a bit behind on blog postings. I hope this has not caused any of my six readers undue anxiety.

We’ve had a fun week together and have not experienced a single alien probing, unlike our unfortunate farmer man in this cartoon. He is lucky, however, that he is about to be probed by the iProd 5, which is much slimmer and more comfortable than previous models. Of course, the old charger won’t work on it because it has a different size port, which is annoying. (more…)

Rex Me Up

bz panel 07-15-13bz strip 07-15-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Badass Messiah.

Over the weekend, Klamelda and I went to a big fundraiser here in LA sponsored by the Derby Dolls: a women’s roller derby league. It was held in several large warehouse spaces and the parking lots of said buildings. They had circus performers and various other sideshow kinds of things, as well as an exhibition match between two derby teams. It was a blast. (more…)

Big Feet, Big…

bz panel 05-18-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Big Camel Toe.

I’m a big fan of Bigfoot cartoons. I am not a believer, as you may have guessed, but I have a friend who is an ardent member of the congregation. Whatever fills your taco shell, right?

The idea for this cartoon came from my good buddy, part-time amateur counselor, and The King of Wordplay, Cliff Harris. Few people love to parse the English language more than this dude. Cliff missed his calling (and didn’t have voicemail) so he became a pediatrician, thinking that was a foot doctor. (This confusion led to his interest in language.) After a few decades of treating sick children (with special attention to their feet) he retired and is now writing clever books for kids (which incorporate some very clever language stuff) though he is yet to be published in that arena. I’ve read them and they’re boffo! I predict big things for you, Cliff! Best of  luck and get back to your keyboard!

Bear Necessity

bz panel 04-26-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Bathroom Humor.

If you’re one of my readers from a non-English-speaking society, you may have been puzzled by this. I don’t know if the old adage depicted in this cartoon is used anywhere other than the U.S., but here, if someone asks a question for which the answer is painfully obvious, like, “Is Congress full of spineless weasels who are owned by corporations and special interest groups?” the other person says, “Does a bear shit in the woods?” (Alternate versions reference the Pope being Catholic, the Pope being Italian, the Pope shitting in the woods, etc. I’m not sure in what ways the Pope is like a bear.) (more…)

Puppet Fish Wood Shaking

Bizarro is brought to you today by Glee!

First, let me thank all of you who left comments on my last post. It’s great to hear from so many of you. Cartooning and blogging can be lonely activities; you create stuff, send it out into the world and wonder if anyone sees it. Before the Interwebs, it was really lonely. The occasional bit of snail mail was all you had to tell you if anyone was reading. (more…)