Guru Saucy DVD Crash

bz panel 10-23-14bz strip 10-23-14bz panel 10-24-14bz strip 10-24-14bz panel 10-25-14bz strip 10-25-14xBizarro is brought to you today by Karma.

 

What this cartoon does not show is the guru’s Craigslist ad. Here it is: “Lonely old geezer seeks topless housekeeper for cave tidying. Must be willing to accept karma as payment.” (Get a print of this cartoon.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here’s one of my favorite gags in a while. Possibly because I’m a big fan of medical marijuana and the concept of governments outlawing plants on the basis of corporate propaganda makes my head explode. Is there no end to the idiocy of the human race? No, there isn’t. (Get a print of this cartoon.) (more…)

Stomp Break Fall Stink

bz panel 09-25-14bz strip 09-25-14bz panel 09-26-14bz strip 09-26-14bz panel 09-27-14bz strip 09-27-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Scary Baby Man.

 

My clever friend in Germany, Michael Roth, had the idea that Ant-Man’s archenemy might be a guy with a big shoe to step on him. I added the picnic basket to drive home the point, as everyone knows that picnics attract ants.

The strip version of this one is turned sideways because I wanted readers to be able to see the entire image, but to shrink it down and place it vertically, as I normally would, would make it too small. I’ve done this a few other times, too, but not often. Here’s one now. (more…)

Legal Hair Wisdom

bz panel 07-24-14bz strip 07-24-14bz panel 07-25-14bz strip 07-25-14bz panel 07-26-14bz strip 07-26-14Bizarro is brought to you today by What Was Eeyore’s Crime?

I’m on vacation this week so I’m keeping my blog comments brief.

 

 

 

Thursday’s cartoon: This one is autobiographical. If you live long enough, chances are it will be for you, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friday’s cartoon: This one is autobiographical, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saturday’s cartoon: This has never happened to me.

Bear Necessity

bz panel 04-26-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Bathroom Humor.

If you’re one of my readers from a non-English-speaking society, you may have been puzzled by this. I don’t know if the old adage depicted in this cartoon is used anywhere other than the U.S., but here, if someone asks a question for which the answer is painfully obvious, like, “Is Congress full of spineless weasels who are owned by corporations and special interest groups?” the other person says, “Does a bear shit in the woods?” (Alternate versions reference the Pope being Catholic, the Pope being Italian, the Pope shitting in the woods, etc. I’m not sure in what ways the Pope is like a bear.) (more…)