Fortune Butch Safety Bus

bz panel 08-21-14bz strip 08-21-17bz panel 08-22-14bz strip 08-22-14bz panel 08-23-14bz strip 08-23-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Infamous Vessel of Calming Liquid.

Here’s one of my not-so-rare cameo appearances in Bizarro, along with my amazing womanpartner (girlfriend just seems too juvenile at our age and experience,) Olive Oyl. I don’t have a Smart Car, but both she and I have tiny little Fiat 500s, hers is all electric. And neither of us have had our cars crushed by SUVs (knock on wood.)  The electric Fiat is a terrific car with amazing pickup and speed and I’ll likely be switching over soon. It’s actually faster and more peppy than my gas-powered one! And you can go 100 miles on a full charge, which only costs $4. These cars are only available in California and Oregon, I guess because those are the only places with ample public charging stations to support the kind of sales they need to make it worth their investment. And California gives you a $2500 rebate for getting one. Can’t beat it. (more…)

Kissmoss

Bizarro 12-08-13 WEBBizarro 12-08-13 hdr

 

 

 

 

 

 

(For the looking at it bigger, click the any wheel on the orange tricycle.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Don’t Just Complain, Do Something!

I’m not a big fan of Xmas, what with the hideously ugly decorations and lights, and the unbearably obnoxious songs and commercials. A couple of decades ago I gave up giving or expecting cards or gifts at this time of year, seeing the holiday primarily as a department-store construct that has succeeded in putting social pressure on most people to buy stuff they can’t afford for people who don’t need it. And since I’m neither a fan nor a devotee of any religion, it has no meaning for me in that context, either. But, since there’s no getting rid of it now, to at least make it a little more interesting, I’m going to suggest we combine Xmas with Halloween. If you see me on the street this December, please wish me a “scary Xmas.” (more…)

Xmas comiX

‘Twas the night before Christmas and I was too lazy to type out “it was.”

For your holiday amusement, I present today’s cartoon PLUS a few of my favorite Bizarro cartoons from past years. Feel free to copy, save, forward, post, etc. Have a happy and prosperous whatever you’re having, Jazz Pickles.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Clown Cat Homework Murder

Bizarro is brought to you today by Cross-Country Move.

I’ve not been blogging the past few days because I was moving to LA. I’m here now, without my stuff, it’s all on a van somewhere between the East and West Coast. Unless the guys who picked it up were frauds and are flying to Rio with my clothes and furniture. If that is the case, I hope they’ll be happy together. (more…)

Mother’s Day!

Bizarro is brought to you today by The Perfect Mother’s Day Gift.

I notice from calendar that today is Mother’s Day. If I had noticed six weeks ago when I drew this cartoon that it was going to run on Mother’s Day, I might have made it have something to do with that. Other cartoonists seemingly go out of their way to do feel good cartoons on these kinds of holidays but I’m too stupid to think that far ahead. (more…)