Sky Schooling

Bizarro 05-15-16 HdrWEB(If thee must embiggenate, do so with a click to any man-made object in any cartoon.)Bizarro 05-15-16 WEB

Bizarro is brought to you today by Unusual Methods.

These days, skywriting is done by computer or some other form of technological voodoo, but in the old days, people flew around and spelled words out in the air mechanically by releasing some puffy white stuff at the appropriate time. Ever since I was a child I’ve wondered how the pilot knew what the thing they were creating looked like from the ground. Today’s big, spectacular, double-wide Sunday cartoon shows how I imagine they might have practiced. (On an interesting side note, when the industry switched to computerized skywriting, the dessert topping industry took a major hit and has yet to recover, as chronicled here.)
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Joining Twins

 

Bizarro is brought to you today by A Visit To A Town In Arkansas Called Flippin.Bizarro 07-12-15 hdr Bizarro 07-12-15 WEBHere’s an odd bit of punctuation fun. If you’re not familiar with punctuation and have never (or rarely) used it, it’s those little dots and dashes that sometime squeeze themselves in between words or hover magically above them. In this case, the little dash after the last “E” in Siamese is called a “comma” and changes the meaning of the caption. Without it, it would not be referring to a cat, which it is, but would instead lead one to believe I had used an outdated, non-PC term for conjoined twins. Which I have not. In spite of the impression your 7th grade English teacher gave you, punctuation can be fun.bz panel 07-06-15Way back last Monday I published this cartoon about mice. Part of what’s funny about it is that mice don’t wear clothes or enter the medical profession. bz panel 07-07-15At the risk of sounding immodest, I really like this little bait-and-switch optical illusion cartoon or whatever you want to call it. I think tiny people inside of desk intercoms are funny.bz panel 07-08-15For the most part, critics have been kind to me over the years. One key, of course, is that critics don’t critique cartoonists very often. The worst thing about critics, however, is that they feel they MUST say something negative, even in a positive review, to avoid the impression that they are ass-kissing. Lousy ones do little more than trash people.bz panel 07-09-15This witch/cop cartoon is another grammar-related thing, I guess. Some people think wordplay is lowbrow but I like it under certain circumstance. bz panel 07-10-15If you’ve ever had a chicken bone in your throat, this cartoon needs no explanation.bz panel 07-11-15This cartoon came to me as I was thinking about the story of Little Red Riding Hood. In the original story, as I recall, the wolf eats the grandma, nearly eats LRRH, then a woodsman shows up, cuts open the wolf and pulls the grandma out of its stomach thus saving her life. I think this is a terrible story to tell children because it inaccurately teaches them that wolves do not chew their food.
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Bear Blog Mouse Eskimo

bz panel 11-17-14bz strip 11-17-14bz panel 11-18-14bz strip 11-18-14bz panel 11-19-14bz strip 11-19-14Bizarro is brought to you today by Freudian Typo.

Insider tip: Don’t bother calling Teddy Bear Headquarters on a Monday. Those dudes are some picnic-loving freaks.

 

 

 

 

 

Insider tip: Don’t use a therapist who has a blog on which he features highlights from each week’s therapy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Insider tip: Mice taxis are notoriously inefficient. But when you’re spending your life in a rodent prison, it’s worth a try.
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Noah’s Canoe

Bizarro 02-23-14 hdrWEBBizarro 02-23-14 WEB

(To see these images bigger, click on any character’s nose.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by The Passing of the Pickle.

 

My favorite part of this cartoon and the title panel are the drawings. The title panel art is a character I drew in one of my sketchbooks, which are full of strange things that I have no real use for in Bizarro, but I occasionally will use one for a title panel. (more…)