Cave Art

 

(Cause the below cartoon to embiggenate by tapping the big elephant.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Being Considerate.

Should you be having any trouble with understanding today’s cartoon, think about what cave dwellers typically painted and where they painted them. Then consider the definition of avant-garde. If you still don’t get it, go to the nearest window and jump out of it. But make sure it is on the ground level and that there is a soft place to land. No need to get overly dramatic about a cartoon, for crap’s sake.
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Thief Boobs Puppet

Bizarro is brought to you today by Career Opportunities.

When did criminals stop wearing those cute little taxi-driver caps, a Lone Ranger mask and a striped, long-sleeved T-shirt? Probably around the time banks stopped printing dollar signs on the sides of their money bags, but if I was going to commit a crime, I would definitely dress that way because people would never guess you were actually a criminal. They’d just think you were going to a costume party or something. Furthermore, if I was in jail and relegated to wearing one of those bright orange jumpsuits that say “PRISONER” or whatever across the back, I’d only escape on Halloween night. You could saunter down the street, even stop and chat with cops, and nobody would suspect a thing. A Halloween parade would be an excellent getaway vehicle. Also for a murderer covered with blood and carrying a chainsaw. (more…)