Various Vermin

Once again, I was unable to find the time to complete my weekly blog last week so this post has TWO WEEKS of cartoons, which my abacus tells me is FOURTEEN!

(For a righteous embiggenation, click the chick in the below pic.)

I’ve been told by scientists that the above cartoon is completely possible as long as the bungee cord is made of something much stronger and more flexible than anything we’ve yet discovered and the alien is friction proof. I chose the setting intentionally because, like Bigfoot, extraterrestrials tend to appear before inebriated country folk more than anyone else.

Lettuce Pray

(For those who are curious about the emgiggenation arts, click any image.)

At this writing we are two days away from celebrating what may be America’s last birthday and that’s the reason for this patriotic cartoon. It might not seem patriotic at first, but consider this:

Scientific consensuses are rare but recent polls have shown that the overwhelming majority of science professionals agree that large-scale head transplant programs are America’s best hope of ever returning to something remotely resembling sanity. Accordingly, for the sake of our democracy,  I support experimental efforts like the one above. The sooner we perfect these procedures, the sooner we’ll get out of this nightmare.


Bizarro 11-01-15 hdrWEB

(Wanna see it more embiggenated? Click the cartoon with the pointy hand deal.)Bizarro 11-01-15 clr WEB

Bizarro is brought to you today by Unusual Things To Do With Children.

When I lived in NYC I used to occasionally enjoy watching people playing with miniature boats in the big pond in Central Park. May I assume you will not be surprised to discover that it was the inspiration for this cartoon? I’m glad that a hurricane hasn’t hit somewhere this week and killed tons of people, otherwise folks would be all up in my grill about making fun of tragedy too soon, not realizing I submitted this cartoon for publication weeks ago. Here are a few fun things in the background of this pic that you might not be able to see even in the embiggenated view: The white sign just right of center says, “Zoo, Pool, Thugs, Vermin”: The food cart in the far background on the left is selling “Fried Vermin”: On the park bench in the center is a woman with a bird head: The pigeon in the right foreground corner is standing on my signature. Other than that, there are also 10 “secret symbols,” as the small number above my signature implies. If you’re not aware of the secret symbols, check out this link here, but keep it to yourself or they won’t be secret anymore.