Stolen Babies

Bizarro 01-03-16 hdrWEB

(To achieve enbiggenation of any cartoon, squint your eyes and click it.)Bizarro 01-03-16 WEB

Bizarro is brought to you today by Scary Logic.

I haven’t seen one of these absurd, invented-crises daytime talk shows in years and wasn’t sure they still existed but recently, while watching something sophisticated and intelligent, I happened to see a commercial for The Jerry Springer Show. Apparently, it’s still on the air with recent episode titles like “Played by a Transsexual,” “Wives Battle Mistresses,” “Stripnotized,” “Battle Royal for Cheese,” and “My Father is My Mother.” Only one of those titles is fake, see if you can guess which one. I’ll put the answer at the end of this post. The larger point is that sometimes it scares me to be trapped on the same planet as people who participate in these shows (onscreen or as viewers) and scares me even more that most of them are allowed to vote. I know that makes me sound like an insufferable elitist but I have long condoned requiring people to pass a simple IQ test before being allowed to vote. Nothing complex, maybe just one or two multiple choice questions like––
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Salty Sex

bz panel 07-24-13bz strip 07-24-13Bizarro is brought to you today by Real Life Mermaid.

Anyone remember the film, “Splash”? It came out in the late 1900s and starred Tom Hanks as a New York guy and Daryl Hannah as a mermaid who’s walking around temporarily on legs for some reason, and they fall in love. Daryl was sexy as can be in that movie and everyone fell in love with her. Tom was probably really sexy, too, but I don’t recall. (more…)