Midnight Crush

Bizarro 05-24-15 hdrWEB Bizarro is brought to you today by Delicious Insect Vomit.

The tremendously gifted artist, Tim Biskip, once said that he is an artist so he can create things he wants to see but that don’t exist. I’ve never put it in those words but that’s the fun of cartooning, too: creating a moment that doesn’t exist in the real world but would be funny if it did. I really like this idea of Bizarro 05-24-15 WEBcombining Cinderella with Godzilla. She attacks the castle, chews on a tower, midnight strikes so she must run but the prince has already fallen in love. All he has left of her is a minivan-sized, three-toed glass slipper. So romantic.bz panel 05-18-15 bz panel 05-19-15 bz panel 05-20-15 bz panel 05-21-15 bz panel 05-22-15 bz panel 05-23-15
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Quintuple Cavalcade of Comedy

Bizarro is brought to you today by Tiny Alien.

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Monday: Dogs are funny. Dogs without electronics are just sad. (Get a print of this cartoon.)

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Tuesday: I was on a jury once for a one-day civil trial and it was boring as hell. I can imagine after a long trial wishing that someone would kill me. (Get a print of this cartoon.)
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Against the Wall

bz panel 09-07-13storebz strip 09-07-13storeBizarro is brought to you today by Hell On Earth.

This cartoon is meant to be about stores in general that broadcast TV commercials where everyone is beautiful and happy. But with the overweight old guy greeting customers and the badly-dressed, obese customer, it distinctly resembles a Walmart. (For my European and Asian readers, that’s a chain of stores the size of an indoor soccer stadium that sell everything you can imagine: clothes, appliances, electronics, furniture, carpets, shoes, tools, soap, prepackaged and fresh foods, guns, ammo, tires, sporting equipment, prescription drugs, you name it. They have prices so low that they drive all of the independently owned stores in the community out of business, then the owners and employees of those stores typically have to work for Walmart, because all of the other jobs are gone and they can no longer afford to shop anywhere else. Sort of American capitalism’s version of debtor’s prison.) (more…)

Beyond

(To see a less-small version of this cartoon, click on the spiral!)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Bark Vadar.

This cartoon combines one of my most  hated activities with one of my most cherished ones; I hate franchise shopping––which in most parts of the corporate utopia that is 21st-century America is all that is left––and I love hallucinogenic journeys of self discovery. (more…)