What Next?
This is an era when a person can understandably be heard to shout from their balcony, “What next?!” Honestly, at this point would a plague of bears be all that surprising? It would certainly be cuter than the current plague of idiocy ramming its fist up the backside of America, and probably less dangerous. A panda can kill a person but they aren’t particularly good at dismantling democracies.
One might think that a self-aggrandizing clown like Donny JT (my suggested stage name should he continue to irritate me after his exile by becoming a rapper) would make it easier for a humorist but the opposite is true. One of the most useful weapons in a cartoonist’s arsenal is exaggeration and that aspect has been completely taken away. Even if Donny says or does something shocking and inappropriate, by the time you create and post a cartoon about him, it’s two hours later and he’s already done and said a dozen other shocking things and no one can even remember what you’re referencing. That is, if they are even paying attention and haven’t climbed into a meditation cave somewhere in hopes of reaching a less odious dimension.
A friend, Brian, asked me if I saw any cartoon potential in the similarity of the words “pandemic” and “panda”. At first, I did not. But then I asked myself: In the divine sit-com that we call human civilization—and the gods probably call something like, “Brief Parade of Morons” or “The Amazing Race to Self-Destruction”—what could possibly surprise us anymore? A Pandamic came to mind.
As I am writing this on Sunday morning, the following calendar alert appeared on my screen and I think it summarizes our fork in the road rather well. Which holiday will you celebrate? The one that continues to congratulate white Europeans for subjugating most of the world, or the one that recognizes that subjugating people has its consequences and they don’t just “magically go away,” any more than viruses do.
Let’s find out in what ways Wayno’s Bizarro cartoons for the week will surprise us…
We got quite a few questions about this one. One person said their entire office tried to figure it out and came up empty. It’s a simple vanity plate and, like many of those things, if you read the names of the letters out loud, it sounds like a word. Good luck!
If this facemask crap persists for years, I might move to some kind of fun space helmet thing like kids played with in the 60s.
Looks like Hopalong could stand to add some power walking or running to his hopping regimen.
I can’t wait to find out what happens next week when he clashes with the Batman card.
If you’re in a hurry, you can use the sporklift.
Wayno’s weekly cartoon blog post about this batch is waiting for you back at the beginning of this sentence. I hope you like Shirley Bassey as much as I do!
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That concludes this week’s cartoon aptitude test, Jazz Pickles. Thanks for putting your pencils down when the egg timer went off. If you’ve enjoyed the arrangement of the pixels on this page, please consider helping us continue by visiting some of the links below. All of us at Rancho Bizarro—Ma, the critters, and me—will appreciate your support mightily.
Until next time, spend some time thinking about a better future and less time worrying about the worst.
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