Bizarro | Naked Cartoonist

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Comedy, Tragedy, and Water

The scene above happened at Skywalker Ranch, of course, and if I know George Lucas (I don’t) he had a dump truck full of uncooked rice onhand to revive these movie stars. That’s the first layer of this cartoon.

The second layer is that each of these robot costumes had a real human actor inside of it (if you can call rolling around and waving your arms “acting”) and none would be able to either swim in their respective contraption or extract themselves quickly enough to save their life. So this would have been a true tragedy.

The third layer is the question of why were these actors wearing their uncomfortable costumes at a pool party, close enough to the water to fall in? Perhaps it was because—with the exception of one of the characters shown above—most people would never recognize the actor who played these characters without his costume. Perhaps this is their only portal to celebrity attention. (Some people find this kind of attention worth risking their lives for.)

The one exception I mentioned above is Robocop who was played by Peter Weller, an actor who played other roles in which he was recognizable as himself. I shared a couple of drinks and cigars with Peter Weller one time at an LA cigar bar I attended with a friend who knew him. He was intelligent, funny, and pleasant.

“Shared” is a funny word in this context—we did not drink from the same glass and pass one cigar back and forth like a couple of hobos in a freight car, though that would have made a more interesting story. It was the less-creepy, more socially-acceptable kind of share in which we each had our own drink and cigar but shared a table and some conversation. For what it costs per year to belong to this particular cigar bar, you could buy your own freight car. I was not and am still not a member.

For the record, though I used to smoke a lot of cigars (6 to 10 per day!) I don’t smoke tobacco anymore and am glad I gave it up. I still consume alcohol, however, and I would talk to a movie star if they asked politely.

I also still enjoy reviewing Wayno’s Bizarro comics with my incredibly awesome Jazz Pickles each week so let’s do that now!…

I was just thinking that the way they distinguish male from female in these international symbols is with a skirt on the woman. I’m not sure why exactly, but that seems sexist. I think it would be more fair and accurate if they simply put a generic penis and vagina on the symbols instead. Here are my prototypes.

I’m not sure of my exact blood type but I’m almost positive I’m negative.

Well, he’s obviously kinky or he wouldn’t be carrying those big paddles. Over on Wayno’s cartoon blog post for this week, he features a photograph of an actual mermaid, by the way.

Hey, if you’re not aware of the history behind why popular images of the Devil have an arrow-tipped tail give it a look. Pretty interesting.

Unless you’ve been on another planet for a couple of decades or you’re actually a Qanon follower, you know that the whole conspiracy theory thing is insane right now and allowing bad politicians to manipulate the world in very scary ways. The scariest part is that it is so easy to do. I recently saw a documentary about how many relatively “normal” people get sucked into the Flat Earth Society. I always figured it was a tongue-in-cheek organization like Church of the SubGenius, but NO, they really believe that all of the science to the contrary is an elaborate hoax. The human experience is beyond understanding.

Big eraser hats are good protection from government sonic mind-control beams from outer space, too.