Bizarro | Naked Cartoonist

View Original

His Story

I’m Dan Piraro, the creator of the Bizarro newspaper comic. Each week, I post my Sunday Bizarro comic, then a short essay, then the Monday-Saturday Bizarro comics which I turned over to a colleague, Wayno, in January of 2018. Wayno does a weekly blog post, too, and I highly recommend it.

Recently, I read an article about how stone age women actually did more than we had previously thought. They didn’t just gather plants, poop out babies, and cook, they also hunted, built things, and fought in battles. Anyone surprised by this? Is there anyone who has not heard about history being written by the victors, which could also read “people in charge?” 

I think we’re all pretty aware by now that as long as we white males have been in charge, our story has been that white males built the world with very little help from women or dark-skinned folks (except for the ones owned by the white guys.) In fact, some of our modern white males are deeply offended by any suggestion otherwise, no matter how true. No surprise there, either; if you’re a crooked boss who's been pocketing his employees’ bonuses, the last thing you want is a public audit of your books. 

But bigoted ignoramuses aside, the rest of us know that women have always been an integral part of society, playing not only an equal role but most likely a dominant role in every last thing we do as a people.

It’s been my experience that even supposedly “submissive” women tend to still be running things in the background. Throughout history, without women, we men would still be scratching our asses in trees and burrows instead of boardrooms and sports bars. (I’m speaking metaphorically, of course, ignoring the reproductive role women play in the very existence of every man.) 

The same is true for minorities. To the degree that women and minorities have been allowed to contribute to society or any specific field, they have. But their contributions tended not to be recorded with the frequency and gravitas as white males.

Now, every time I denigrate the role of white men in society, I lose some readers and receive some angry comments. That’s to be expected. I think some people are afraid that if white folks in the US admit what we’ve done to Black folks, it will stir Black folks up and there will be a backlash. Um, really? Do they think that Black Americans don’t already know what’s been going on? Maybe a different approach is needed.

Here’s the part where I propose my solution to what I’ve come to call The White Male Problem.

(No, this has nothing to do with erectile dysfunction, although judging by the size of some of the Confederate flags I’ve seen waving above pickup trucks in the South, there is a fair amount of microphallus syndrome involved.) Instead, this is the part where you realize I’ve been leading you on because I don’t have a proposal. Sorry about that. I’m not a genius, just a critic.

To my mind, racism is an offshoot of tribalism and unfortunately, it is engrained in the nature of humans. It comes all too easily and naturally to us to distrust a person who is different from us. Certain types of politicians know this and use it to turn uncertainty into fear of “the other”: Blacks, non-heteronormatives, immigrants, vegans, you name it. We’ve seen a lot of this in the world recently—also previously and for as long as there have been politicians. It’s an ancient trick that always works as long as people are not educated about history, especially their own.

This also explains why the current Trump-worshipping wing of the Republican Party wants to ban books that teach about racism in America. As one journalist* put it last week, modern Republicans are more afraid of the effects of education on their children than of guns.

*I can’t recall where I saw that. If you know, please tell me who said it!

THAT WAS TOO SERIOUS! Let’s break the mood by having a chuckle or six at Wayno’s Bizarro cartoons for the week…

I think this happened in Portland, which, if you think about it, is also a portmanteau.

This dude looks like he’s trippin’ biscuits.

Wayno’s weekly blog post has some very interesting extras today. Don’t miss it.

I did a live radio interview this week and it’s been archived online. I talked for a little over half and hour about creativity and living in Mexico and who knows what else. If you want to hear it, go to this page, scroll to the bottom and click the PLAY arrow on the black bar.

I saw a Christo exhibit in New York City once and I can’t remember a thing about it. I guess that tells you a little about my attitude toward much conceptual art.

This guy is just determined to cause trouble.

That wraps up today’s cartoon intelligence test. Give yourself two points for every joke you chuckled at. If you didn’t understand one or more gags, award yourself 8. 4 points. If you laughed out loud at my opening essay, deduct 17 points. When you’re finished, no matter your score, award yourself a doctorate in the field of your choice.

If you’re enjoying what we do, please help us keep doing it via one of the links below. We will think of you fondly.

Until next week, put your pants on one leg at a time unless you’re wearing a kilt.

BIZARRO SHOP Fun and cheap!

… Bizarro TIP JAR One-time or repeating. Your choice!

Wayno TIP JAR

Signed, numbered, limited edition prints and original Bizarro panels  

PEYOTE COWBOY WEBSITE

SUPPORT Peyote Cowboy

Peyote Cowboy Instagram

DIEGO PIRARO FINE ART

Bizarro Cartoons on Instagram 

King Features Subscription + archive access