Monthly Mooning
Thanks to my good buddy Cliff Harris the King for his contribution to this mooning.
I’m Dan Piraro, the creator of the Bizarro newspaper comic. Each week, I post my Sunday Bizarro comic, a short essay, and then the past week’s Monday-Saturday Bizarro comics written and drawn by my partner Wayno, whose weekly blog post I highly recommend.
And here’s this week’s ANSWER KEY to my Sunday comic’s Secret Symbols.
Hello again, Jazz Pickles. I hope your jar has been cozy this week.
I have a love/hate relationship with bragging. As a young boy, I’d come home from school and want to impress my parents by telling them I’d gotten a gold star on an assignment or third place in the class spelling bee.
Mom was always excited and supportive, but my dad was often more reserved. At some point, he embarrassed me by saying, “No one likes someone who begins every sentence with ‘I’.”
Thanks, Pop. What a third-grader needs more than anything is crushing humility.
Dad’s a great guy and no parent is perfect, but since that day, I’ve hated being seen as a person tooting my own horn. But I love sharing good news—who doesn’t?
I hope you’ll forgive the cacophonous braying of my trumpet today as I share some of the gold stars I’ve received from the articles I’m writing for my subscription writing project The Naked Cartoonist.
“We used to only get you through the comics. Then we got glimpses in the blog postings. Now we have this column. Well worth the money (which is negligible) and the consumption time. Keep it up!” —B.
“Dan, you're probably saving many people thousands of dollars in psychiatric bills, if they're paying serious attention to your monologues!” —W.J.R.H.
“Dan, you're the best inspiration towards honesty, thanks to your articles! I for a long time admired your surrealistic humour and cartoons, but your writings are outstanding. Respect for your willingness to open up to this degree of nakedness.” —H.
“Dan, I look forward to these articles and pore over every word, so please never stop writing and sharing. Only a few people online write my truth, and you are one of them.” —D.
“That is so on target, Dan. There is a reason that "To thine own self be true" endures as a proverb. Thanks for your vulnerability. It is encouraging in a hostile world.” —D. H.
“Words of wisdom as ALWAYS!!! Don't let it go to your head : ), but I think you are the wisest man I have encountered!!!” —K.
The love/hate thing: It embarrasses me to post those but these kinds of comments humble me and bring tears to my eyes. I’m not trying to be adorable when I say that—I’ve long loved writing and am thrilled that people are finding my meager efforts meaningful.
When I started the NC project, I envisioned it being more about humor than anything else, and many of my early articles were no more than ridiculous romps. But as I honed my voice, I settled into a humorous approach to personal stories and life lessons.
I’m open to going any direction with them, but I most often end up with humorous depictions of wisdom I’ve gleaned from bumbling my way through life’s dark corridors.
For $5 a month, you can read all 45 articles I’ve posted so far, and receive an email every two weeks when I post a new one. Cancel at any time and I won’t be hurt. (much)
I often post slightly edited versions of these stories on medium.com the following week, so if you’re a member there, look me up by my name and save yourself the extra $5. I get a few bucks from those articles, too. (A membership to Medium is also $5/mo.)
Just to be clear, I don’t use this money to buy mansions or fund orgies on private planes full of horny, middle-aged politicians. I use it for food and utilities in an attempt to wait a few more years before I bust into my (insufficient) retirement savings.
I didn’t say that to make you feel sorry for me—you most certainly should not!
It’s just to let you know I’m a real person making my way through this weird life the same as you. Whether you kick in a few extra dollars for my efforts or not, I appreciate your readership, and Wayno and I often comment on how we have the coolest readers on the web.
(Wayno’s blog post this week coincidentally says the same thing for other reasons!)
Since ’tis the season, here are some cartoon gift ideas:
A holiday auction of my original cartoon art and signed/numbered prints continues until December 12, 7pm Pacific Standard Time. (Plenty of low bids and great deals!)
Bizarro shirts, hats, patches, 2025 calendars, and holiday ornaments for your tree, your menorah, or your parade float can be found at the Comics Kingdom Shop.
Here’s a gift suggestion that Wayno and I don’t have a financial stake in: “Funny Stuff: How great cartoonists make great cartoons” is a fun book about single-panel gag cartoons, the sort you’d find in the New Yorker or Bizarro. It includes interviews with cartoonists like me, and one of the authors is a friend of mine.
Let’s have a gander at Wayno’s Bizarro cartoons from the week!…
Every home should have one.
Oddly, “Cameron” is her imaginary friend.
I’m guessing that pipe under the bar is attached by a piece of gum.
Or if you’re shirtless, someone else’s.
Superman crushed his bottle in his hand and now he'll never get that fist open.
There is no greater mind-F than time, and here are three purveyors of this popular illusion.
Before we go, I posted a new episode of my graphic novel Peyote Cowboy yesterday. I hope you’ll have a look!
Thanks for your fermented attention, Jazz Pickles. Below is my usual list of ways to support our efforts. You’re the best!
The Naked Cartoonist…My weekly subscription newsletter of humorous creative writing, photos, art, & more.
… Bizarro TIP JAR One-time or repeating. Your choice!
WAYNO’S TIP JAR One-time or repeating. Your choice!
My graphic novel PEYOTE COWBOY
…Signed, numbered, limited-edition prints and original Bizarro panels
COMICS KINGDOM SHOP (now with Bizarro products!)