Bizarro | Naked Cartoonist

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Ill Wind

There’s lots of talk in the U.S. these days about the American Drug Cartel, which is what I call the health and pharmaceutical industry there. But talking about it too much makes me sick and like most Americans, I can’t afford to get sick. So I’ll just say I hope the U.S. can catch up with every other first-world nation real soon.

On the lighter side, if you’re the kind of person who wants to buy something cool for somebody in your life, I can help. I know an artist who is trying to eke out a living in an increasingly Internet world so he made an online store that provides fun stuff at decent prices. Last week he released a bunch of new products. This week, he added a new hat to his line of Secret Symbol hats! In this way, a person can both keep their Bizarro noggin warm and help keep the chickens fed at their favorite imaginary cartoon ranch!

There are also Secret Symbol coffee mugs (they also hold scotch or tequila—I’ve tested them) and a new Bizarro Jazz Pickle design on a mug or a hoodie. But my personal fave new product is this Moto Bunny hoodie. You really can’t go wrong with any of them and all of our products will improve your life in multiple intangible but powerful ways!

Time now to see what humor gifts Wayno has bestowed upon us in his cartoons this week…

The backstory here is that the aforementioned carrion happened to be a human finger, thus adding another layer of irony. On a side note, I congratulate Wayno for resisting the term “flipping the bird”.

Even in Shakespeare’s day, childish violence was funny as hell.


They sell these at Tsarbucks, of course. This month, they’re selling a lot of Potemkin Spice Lattes.

This one got a lot of “OK Boomer” responses on our Instagram account. Kids: if you have to rely on a preprogrammed, cliche, witty response, maybe you shouldn’t be in the witty response business.

When you’re trying to convince a jury of your story, do you want “Pop Goes the Weasel” as your intro? That’s a question that dozens of Trump associates have had to ask themselves in recent years and weeks. I’m hoping against hope that The Weasel himself will go to jail someday but I know that’s a longshot given America’s soft spot for the uber-rich and pretend patriots.

Alternate caption: “I couldn’t find the pie server thing so I’m using a garden spade. Don’t tell Daddy.”

That’s all the comedy we can stomach this week, Jazz Pickles. Thanks for holding your lunch down with us. If you enjoy what we do and that we do it without ads or paywalls, please grab some gifts from our shop or visit some of the other links below, which all helps to keep our liferaft full of air.

Until next time, be smart, be nice, be happy, and resist ignorance, fascism, and nationalism.

BIZARRO SHOP (Perfect gifts for the schnarbenflietzs in your life!)  

… Bizarro TIP JAR

DIEGO PIRARO FINE ART…where you can buy my paintings or prints of them from me personally!

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Signed, numbered, limited edition prints and original Bizarro panels  

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